Before filling out the agreement

Topics to discuss / think about before mediation

It is recommended that you as a parent think and discuss certain topics before filling out the co-parenting agreement. The types of topics might be:  

Is your agreement adapted to the age of your child? This also means that as the child grows older the agreement should be revised.  

Which parent has been mostly together with the child? Should this continue? Why, or why not?  

How far will you be moving apart? Will the commute be too far and often for the child?  

How can you both as parents make this transition as easy as possible for your child?  

What are your qualities as a parent and what are the other parent's qualities?  

Are you able to be home, or do you have someone to be home to take care of your child? This could be an issue if one parent has long and/or unpredictable working days.  

If any of you has a new partner: How is your child's relation to your new partner and/or the other parent's new partner?  

Have you both talked about the future living situation with your child and let him/her tell his/her wishes. In accordance with the UN Convention on the Rights of the Child Article 12.  
“Article 12  

1. States Parties shall assure to the child who is capable of forming his or her own views the right to express those views freely in all matters affecting the child, the views of the child being given due weight in accordance with the age and maturity of the child.  

2. For this purpose, the child shall in particular be provided the opportunity to be heard in any judicial and administrative proceedings affecting the child, either directly, or through a representative or an appropriate body, in a manner consistent with the procedural rules of national law.” (  

NB. This does not mean that the child has or should be forced to answer questions regarding where he or she wants to live, but shall be given the possibility to say what he or she wants to say. Some children may have a hard time answering questions about where they want to live due to they might feel that they are picking sides with one parent, or because it is a really hard choice and they love you both.

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